thedarknesswrites

Lone
I’m a lone
In stark contrast to my usual humorous self I share a little of my insides.
I’m a lone. Relatives are few in number ,what I do have is material things with relationship memories attached to them these do not in any way substitute for living breathing feeling relatives , and in some ways add to the sadness of my days but to depart with them makes me feel i’d be more of a lone I’m not here to debate how I ended up in such a state no doubt it’s probably my fault .
As I struggle to put a positive slant to these nocturnal thoughts being a ” lone” does not mean I’m not blessed , for I’m truly blessed with friends who try to lift me from my lonesome state , and then there’s all of creations my pets, and the beauty of the skies to help me not feel alone but then in the silences of the night comes these incessant thoughts, your a lone ,YOUR A LONE , but I’m reminded I’m one of a million lones I see them all over people aimlessly walking down the streets in odd clad clothes to keep warm , probably made a wrong turn somewhere in life and can’t seem to get on track or maybe they have just given up .
I must not give up. I see Lones in stores buying frozen TV dinners or dinners for one might as well say dinners for LONES . Just the other night I went caroling with our church and I saw a lot of LONES
As we approach another Christmas season with all the commercials about families I will be praying for us LONES I will thank GOD for the love and compassion he has given me and I will reach out to a Lone when I can because in some way we are connected and maybe just maybe we are not a LONE.
By Meredith J Weir
All rights reserved
12/19/13

Crushed mustard
There’s so much sadness in the air,
clouds filled with losses and despair
My friend’s cups are overflowing
With doubts, and fears and just
“Notknowings”
Their mustard seeds of faith seem
crushed, and joys and laughters all seemed hushed.
yet on the ground I see its dust, and flecks of seeds that were dispelled
Show me they can live beyond this hell .
Now don’t take me as the “there, there type” , my pains and trials I wouldn’t swipe but think me as a trusted friend ,who wants only to see you round the bend .
This worlds cares I can’t explain ,
( nor me awake right now in pain)
But morn will come, the day says yes regardless if our life’s a mess
The present pain will soon be past
It’s honing done, no more to last .
The trials endured the grinding done
The battle fought, the victory won .
By Meredith J Weir
M
All rights reserved
This may only be used with the expressed permission of the author
( me)

Yes it has been a while since I’ve written, trying to emerge from the dark side of this symbiotic relationship. The dictionary definition of symbiosis, from the Psychiatric side is ” A relationship between two people in which each person is dependent upon and receives reinforcement, (whether beneficial or detrimental, )from the other.”well I’m  trying to be different, make different choices,trying to see beyond our likenesses, but I have to tell you they’re has to be many ,many people who have experience this torment. When your symbiotic other half, passes on .Whether it was a somewhat healthy relationship or not there remains a void.  A large void ,You have to find a new ” normal”

Especially hard when you know you march to the beat of a different drum! One might think that it would be refreshing not to feel judgement at every turn and decision, but this one feels lost like walking on a thinly ice  frozen lake, each step is too scary to make so bear with me , I’ll be back .

So I started a blog and thought this will be easy to keep up since I thought the time slot will never get filled, but I was wrong. please stay tune as I bring in some poetry from the past and hopefully churn up my creative juices. The darkness will still write on….